CHOOSE FIDUCIARIES

Start by identifying the people you wish to act on your behalf in the event of your incapacity or death. Your appointees should be competent to act, understand your wishes, and be likely to carry them out. The three most important jobs tend to be the guardian of minor children, your patient advocate charged with making medical decisions, and your successor trustee appointed to manage trust assets after your disability or death. It is advisable to choose both primary and contingent fiduciaries for all appointments in the event your first choice is unable or unwilling to act.

NAME BENEFICIARIES

Who is to inherit your estate? If you have children, treat them equally, except in extremely rare circumstances. Unequal shares will surely leave a legacy of hurt feelings and estrangement among your children. If your late spouse has children from a previous marriage, you must decide how to remember them. If your late spouse has a trust, stepchildren may already be remembered.

How you treat step-children will depend on a number of factors including what your conscience tells you, and whether your late spouse remembered them in his trust. Ideally, you and your late spouse executed trusts balancing the needs and expectations of your children and the surviving spouse. If so, those trusts must be strictly administered according to their terms.

The relationship between step-children and a step-parent is often strained. Latent hurt and resentment matures to outright anger and mistrust over what will happen to “dad’s money.” If your late spouse made no provision for his children, you should consider making a gift of money or personal property as an olive branch to encourage continued involvement with them.

CONTROL FROM THE GRAVE

Young beneficiaries shouldn’t inherit too early. If you have small children, you are now the last line of defense between them and the outside world. Having their inheritance held in trust will facilitate their secure future. A trustee of your choosing should manage your assets in the event of your premature disability or death.

Trusts permit you to postpone your children’s inheritance and encourage college attendance. Certainly, eighteen year olds (the age of majority in most states) cannot be permitted unfettered control of their inheritance; nor can beneficiaries with emotional or substance abuse problems or beneficiaries who are either unable or unwilling to work, or who have a predilection for gambling, or otherwise wasting money.

It is your duty to protect your children in the event you aren’t around to parent them. You have the opportunity to speak to them through the words of your trust.